


Last Night, Good Night

by sirius123



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Angst, Character Death, During 5.0, F/M, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Shadowbringers content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:27:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24153547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sirius123/pseuds/sirius123
Summary: He sleeps, she watches. When he wakes the next morning, she greets him with a smile.
Relationships: Warrior of Light/Original Female Character
Kudos: 3





	Last Night, Good Night

**Author's Note:**

> Just something I wrote based off the RP that my friend, Iiro and I are doing! Shadowbringers things, you know, all the angst.
> 
> Featuring my characters Fell and Adelaide. Please enjoy my little brain fart.

Fell hardly slept peacefully, Adelaide mused as she watched her young husband sleep soundly, curled up in the fluffy, new blankets she bought for his return. But tonight was different. The furrowed lines of his brow smoothed out, the ever-present scowl softened by sleep. He looked even younger than he normally did. Reaching out to gently brush a long lock of hair from his face, she wondered if it was the longer life that Elves enjoyed compared to Humes.

Tonight, he rested quietly. She was glad. She often wondered how well he slept. He always seemed tormented by one thing or another, creating worlds in his mind that she couldn’t even begin to understand or comprehend. She never asked, though. Not anymore. She remembered the first time she asked about a nightmare when he bolted awake covered in cold sweat. He didn’t answer her, unable to even look at her. She wondered if the dream had been about her.

In this world, in this lifetime, she had lost her Fell. Her wonderful husband who always smiled too much and carried the weight of the world on his shoulder, but bore it proudly. Her best friend who loved to tell stories and sing in harmony with the birds when he thought no one was looking. This Fell was so much like her Fell, her dear Fell that she loved and lost so long ago. And there were ways he was so much the same. His smile, the way it crinkled his eyes gently, the way he held her and gently stroked her hair until she fell asleep. That was all the same.

But he was haunted by the decisions that he had made, the choices that no one man should make by himself. He was haunted by the blood on his hands that only he could see, the blood he often tried to wash off when he spent too long in the bath or at the sink. His eyes told of loves lost, of lives thrown away in the storm of war, of comrades burned in the fires of chaos. Her heart ached for him. She wished she could take those thoughts from him so he could sleep forever peacefully like this. So he could rest his weary eyes and just dream soft, peaceful dreams where he could get lost in the peace of it all.

She played gently with the lock of hair caught between her fingers, listening to him breathe. She relished the rhythmic sound. She had never thought to hear it pass his lips again. She could still remember that day, the image forever burned in her memory and her heart. The sounds of the dying, of unholy screeches of the Sin Eaters as she buried her infant son’s head into her chest, bidding him stay silent as her young daughter tremble quietly near her. The way the screams and the screeches died in an unnerving silence. They had spent bells, cuddled up in that closet that he hid them in as he joined his brother to fight in the van, to protect the village and neighbors he had loved dearly.

She was waiting for him to return, but he never did. It was Raise who had found them, covered in the white, cold ichor of the Sin-Eaters, his face pale, his hands shaking. When he reached for them, he broke. He had dropped his father’s lance with a loud clatter and fell to his knees, curling up in grief as he rested his head on the floor, his arms wrapped around him as if he could hide from the bitter truth of the world if he just made himself small enough. She remembered how her heart jumped into her throat and the scream that tore from her mouth that day.

She remembered almost dropping her dear Gladiolus, her brave, small daughter taking him from her as she tore from the small closet and flew outside, looking for him. She remembered when she had found him. There were few bodies, those who had fallen joining the ranks of those tainted by the light, but he was still there. The red of his blood was a stark contrast to the paleness of his face and cold light that forever surrounded them in its icy glow. 

She remembered shrieking and begging, breaking the stillness that surrounded them. Begging him to wake up, praying to the gods that lived beyond the vast that they take her instead of him, that she be the one to die in his place. But the gods were cruel and uncaring and she could only watch in numb, hazy silence as they took her love and her heart away. She could only watch as they buried him in the cold, hard ground, leaving her half-formed as they threw dirt over his casket where he lay slumbering for all eternity.

He stirred slightly under her touch. His eyes opened for only a brief moment, the image of him lying dead overlapping with the sight of him smiling sleepily at her. The image changed over and over in her mind, his pale face overlapping one flushed with life, and she couldn’t help the small hitch in her breath as he reached up and gently touched her face with scarred, burned hands, fingers gently tracing the fine line of her cheek and chin.

“Mmm... Is it morning?” he asked sleepily, and she shook her head, finding herself unable to speak for a brief moment as the images blurred and there only sat him, living and breathing and smiling at her like he always did. Tears sprang unbidden to her eyes as she smiled at him shakily, reaching up to touch that warm, wonderful, living hand as it stroked her skin.

“No, no, it’s still very early,” she said softly. “The sun has not yet risen.” He peered over her shoulder to the open window as pale moonlight lit the room in its soft and gentle glow, the sky jeweled with glittering stars. He looked back at her.

“Is everything alright?” He asked her, his voice more awake as he moved to sit up. She reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder, and he paused, looking at her curiously. She shook her head, her smile still soft as she laid down with him, resting her ear against his chest, listening to his heart as it beat a slow rhythm in his chest.

“Yes, everything is alright. I was just looking at the sky,” she said softly. He shifted. She knew he was unconvinced, but said nothing, wrapping her in his arms and burying his nose into her hair. She wondered if the few greying streaks bothered him at all, closing her eyes as he took a slow breath. She did the same, breathing in his familiar scent of fire and oil and the forest. They lay like that for a long time before his breath evened out once more and he was sleeping once more.

She reached up and gripping the soft cotton fabric of his shirt burying her face into the bare skin that lay exposed to her, surrounding herself in his everything. In the warmth of his breath, in the beating of his heart and his scent that smelled like the world. But not her world. A world so far off she couldn’t comprehend it.

Though she wanted it to be so, this wasn’t her Fell. Her Fell lay buried in the cold ground of Eulmore, amongst the ruins of a town that they had loved in, that they had a family in. This Fell was from far off, another world that sounded so much like a dream it was unreal. This Fell had suffered and lost and came to her broken and torn, seeking solace in her arms. Solace that she gladly gave, for she sought the same from him.

She knew, deep in the darkest corners of her mind, that he couldn’t stay with her. That one day, he would do what heroes do and return to his home, to bring it salvation. That one day he would leave her once more, lost in the light and forever out of her reach. He would leave her and their family for a destiny she couldn’t understand.

She felt bitter. To have this chance to wake up with him next to her, to see him awaken with a smile that was meant only for her. Was fate so cruel to bring them together once more, only to remind them that this wasn’t forever, that he would leave them once more? Leave the son who had never known him, leave the daughter that longed for her daddy to see who she had become, to leave the wife who loved him more desperately than the air she needed to breathe?

She pulled away from him slightly, still locked in his strong arms to gazed up at his face. He was as beautiful as the day she lost him, but her? She was not his Adelaide, who died young and beautiful. She was older, with greying hair and skin that was not as smooth and soft as it once had been, that seventeen summers ago when they lay much like this, wrapped in each other’s embrace and dreaming of a better tomorrow. That last, wonderful night they spent together, surrounded by their love for each other.

She wanted him to stay with her forevermore, but he couldn’t. Her Fell had been bound by duty, and this Fell was no different. She could only watch him as he slipped from her embrace and back into the cruel battle to bring the night back to the home her Fell had loved so much he died for it. The only thing she could do for him, for them, was to pray to those cruel gods to keep him safe and whole and hale when he left her.

She wanted his life to be filled with love and hope and to always remember her when times became hard. She wanted him to remember her laugh and the look in her eyes that let him know he was the one who owned her heart. And, when those memories of her began to fade, when he forgot that smile and laugh and the initial sting of them being apart once more wore off and he began to wonder who exactly it was he missed and forgot... She wanted him to remember there was a woman named Adelaide in another world, far off that prayed and wished for his happiness.

“Oh, my love, my heart, my one and only,” she whispered in the white that washed over him, that lit his peacefully slumbering face. “I want this moment to last forever. I will treat every night as though it were the last I can lay wrapped in your arms. I will cherish every moment we spend together so you and I have enough memories that will last us a lifetime.

“You are not my Fell. My Fell died long ago, and your Adelaide left you alone, but I will not leave you alone like she did. Not until you must leave and embrace your destiny.” She rested her forehead against his chest, washed in his breath and his heartbeat. “I don’t know if I’ll have the strength to tell you goodbye when that comes... But I will try to smile bravely and see you off with the memory of us.” She closed her eyes.

“So rest peacefully, my not-Fell. Dream sweetly of us, of your home and the people you love. I will be here when you awaken.” She gripped his shirt once more, trembling. 

“Sweet dreams, my dearest, my heart’s desire. Good night.”


End file.
